Tag Archives: Marriage

Why isn’t God answering my prayer?

Why isn’t God answering my prayer?

That was the question I couldn’t answer at the time.

Last night I ran into someone I haven’t seen in a while. The last time I saw them they were going through the biggest trial of their lives. They had moved to Maryland because of their employment and their wife thought this was the perfect time to end their marriage.

I remember praying with this person, trying to help them understand what was happening and trying to put a plan together to win her back! This person fasted for days, prayed like never before, read a ton of books on marriage and tried to understand his wife. However, there was no fairly tale end to this story. The wife demanded a divorce, the man was crushed and the question he asked me haunted me for months, ‘Why isn’t God answering my prayer?’

To be honest I had no idea! I mean why doesn’t God answer some prayers when quite clearly the bible says ask and it shall be given.

However, as I look back on that situation it is now clear what was going on. This man was going through a trial, so his focus became about that trial. The purpose behind the prayer was the trial. The focus on the fasting was the trial. The change in attitude towards his wife was because of the trial. This was a good man who wanted to save his marriage, but in the midst of a trial so often our focus becomes the trial. We try this and that to stop the pain, when in reality our focus should be Jesus not the trial.

Sometimes God allows a prayer not to be answered in order to take us to a place where our focus becomes him and him alone. A place where we pray just to talk to him not pray to get something. Where we fast to go deeper with him, not to get a breakthrough. Where we treat people well because we the temple of God’s Holy Spirit, not trying to convince others we have changed.

I think some people don’t receive their answer to prayer because God is looking for a response from them, but sometimes we can be focused on our trial that we miss what God is actually trying to do through us!

So today, if you are going through a trial! Take your focus off it, put it on Jesus and ask him to do through you what we needs to do!


You’ve Come So Far!

On Sunday morning I looked at all the faces of the people at Generation Church and the thought came to me, ‘haven’t we come such a long way’.

I wasn’t thinking numerically or financially. I wasn’t thinking about the space we were meeting in compared to a living room only five months ago. Yes we had grown in all those areas, but it was the life paths so many of the people have been on.

I started to think of those who would not have been in church that day unless Generation Church had started. I thought of the marriages that would have broken up if not for the love and support the people of Gen Church had given them. I thought of those who only a few months ago were so closed off to Jesus, now worshiping God in their own unique way.

Then I started to think of how far I had come. From sitting in my church office only two years ago thinking life was great because our church was growing, but having not had a meaningful conversation with someone outside of ‘the faith’ in over five years. To now, not having an office, not having a church salary, not organizing event after event to keep all the church people happy; yet week after week having conversation after conversation with people who do not know God. Reaching out to people I was told I’d never reach. Seeing Christ transform life after life in His image, not ours!

I haven’t got there yet, wherever there is. There is still long way to go. However, as I look back I can’t help but think how far I have come, how far the many of us have come.

Yes there were times when I didn’t even think I’d make another step, times of wanting to give up. Times when the opposition of others almost killed my spirit and faith; but God held strong! He carried me and I’ve watched Him carry so many others and now I can only look back and think, wow, I can’t believe we have come this far!

You may be going through some stuff today. However, just look back and take in for a moment how far you have come! It’s probably way further than you could ever imagine! Then look forward and keep on going!

Quality instead of Quantity

When was the last time you spent quality time with the ones you love?

When I mean quality time I do not mean just an afternoon or a few hours, I mean an extended amount of time just fully focused on those loved ones?

This weekend my wife and I devoted our weekend to quality time with each other. We spent the whole weekend together totally unaffected by outside influences. Many times we can say we spend quality time, but other things such as TV, Phones, agendas and schedules can stop the time being quality.

On Saturday we got up, went to the beach (our phones had no signal!), ate dinner together that evening and spent four hours in the car, just us talking. Then Sunday we got up, went to church then just had fun walking around some stores before finishing the weekend watching a movie together,

Doesn’t sound like much, but it really was quality time. You see we weren’t pre-occupied by our schedule. We weren’t constrained by time, we didn’t have to rush to get anywhere and we didn’t have other things getting in our way.

Sometimes you need weekends like this. Your loved ones need your undivided attention. They don’t need a couple of hours of your time; they need to know from time to time that they are the most important thing for them. They aren’t an appointment in your schedule and they aren’t competing for your attention from other influences. Whether it is your kids, your spouse, your friends or your family, sometimes all they need is just you and only you!

So really ask yourself, when was the last time I spent quality time with my loved ones? For some of you it has been a long time! If so, rip up that schedule and just do it! Your loved ones need YOU more than your schedule.